Jellystone in 2007

Last week I went on what started as a mom and kids camping trip with two of my friends. The first trip was two years ago and the three moms and our 11 kids struck out for Jellystone park outside of Hagerstown. The ages of our crew ranged from 10 months to 8 years.

Since none of us had been camping in years, we all had brand new tents and it took us well over 4 hours to set up camp. That left a smidge of time to enjoy the pool, have dinner, watch an outdoor movie, grab a bit of sleep, eat breakfast and play a round of mini golf before we had to break camp. That first outing was just one night and though it was a lot of work, we decided to try again the next year but for two nights.

Last year, we gained a friend and lost a friend and headed out to Rocky Gap for two nights. This time there were 12 kids between us. Setting up camp went much more smoothly since we were now veteran campers, and the trip bordered on relaxing. The husbands — who hadn’t been so interested in the past — were a little jealous of our successful second year.

This year the group grew as we headed back to Rocky Gap for a second year. Our little threesome became 9 adults (5 moms, two dads, one couple) and 22 kids ranging in age from 3 to 11. The kids had a wild time swimming in the lake, hiking, roasting marshmallows and playing games in the woods bordering our campsites.

Though it’s a lot of work for a mom — it took me a couple of hours to set up camp and a couple more to break it down two days later — I know it’s the stuff that memories are made of. I know my kids will always remember the camping trips I took them on and how much fun we had.

Rocky Gap 2009

My guest blogger today is my co-editor, Cheryl Clemens:

I was torn, as I’m sure many parents were yesterday, about how to explain to their kids the phenomena of Michael Jackson. Younger ones have no clue who he is; older ones only know him within the framework of the child molestation accusations earlier this decade.

Was I a huge MIchael Jackson fan? No. But I remember clearly going to my job as a hostess at a Mexican restaurant the day after the Motown 25th anniversary special where Jackson moonwalked for the first time. Every free minute we had at work that day we spent trying to figure out how to duplicate that move. I remember dancing at my senior prom to “Billie Jean” and marveling at something called a “music video” released the same time “Thriller” was.

His music was such an integral part of the soundtrack of my late teens and early 20s. But my delight in his songs was always impacted by the strange behavior he exhibited. Carry the tiny actor from “Webster” around on his shoulders; building a theme park on his property; marrying Lisa Marie Presley; and, of course, the plastic surgery and makeup.

So how do you explain the death of a phenomena like that? My older two had only a few questions and seemed fixated on nothing but the fact that he had sleepovers with young boys. My younger one? Well, all I could do was bring it right down to a 7-year-old level.

“Michael Jackson was a very popular singer when Mommy was younger,” I told her. “In fact, he started out singing with his brothers and they were so popular, they had their own cartoon.”

“Wow,” she said, obviously impressed.

That was all she needed to know.

Summertime living is like a commune for me.
Last Friday, I passed off one of my kids to the neighbors because he couldn’t go to the pool due to his swimmer’s ear. Then I picked up a friend’s kids to take to the pool because she was moving that day. When I arrived at the pool, I left my kids and my friend’s kids in the care of another friend while I went for a run. When I got back, I watched my friend’s kids so she could go for a run.
Later, a friend realized that her youngest was running a fever so she took him home and left her other three with me. Then another friend had to take her toddler home for a nap, so she left her older two with me.
I was glad I had driven my “bus” to the pool that day because when all was said and done, I had 10 kids in my care. There wasn’t a spare seat to be had on the way home.
The crazy day made me realize just how important it is to have friends when you are raising kids. Not only do they provide the logistical help that can be so necessary at times — they also provide the emotional help. When I did get the chance to sit down and relax for a bit that day — I had friends to vent to, share concerns with and just have fun. It’s become a real cliché but it’s so true that it takes a village to raise a family.

There’s just no way to describe the instant, overwhelming panic a parent experiences when you realize you’ve lost sight of your child.

The Boston-based Center to Prevent Lost Children says that 90 percent of families will momentarily lose track of a child in a public place. With those kinds of odds, it pays to plan ahead.

In case you missed it earlier this week, there was an excellent story by Joe Burris in the Baltimore Sun about high- and low-tech strategies parents can use these days to keep closer tabs on their kids.

From the SafetyTats we profiled earlier this month to hand-held GPS devices to watches that will emit a 110-decibel alarm when activated, it’s amazing what’s available

Of course, nothing will ever replace actually watching your child and holding his or her hand, but in crowded places like stores or amusement parks, parents can often use all the help they can get.

Have you ever temporarily lost sight of your child? What strategies to like best for keeping them safe?

My guest blogger today is my co-editor, Cheryl Clemens:

Later this year will be the 20th anniversary of the day my father decided he didn’t want to be married to my mother anymore.

“I have to do what’s best for me,” he told me on more than one occasion.

So you’ll understand why it really hit home for me while watching the Gosselin marriage implode last night on national TV when Jon Gosselin said, “I have to do what’s best for me.”

I was an adult and married when my parents divorced, and it was still traumatic for my sister and me. I cannot image being 5 years old and living through such an ordeal.

After watching last night’s episode of Jon and Kate Plus Eight, it made me even angrier when I considered the fact that they came to this decision because Jon wants to escape and Kate is tired of fighting and “needs peace.” Kate claims Jon is mad but won’t talk to her about what’s bothering him. Jon says he’s spent years “letting Kate rule the roost” and he went along with it. “Now I’ve finally stood up and I’m proud of myself,” he explained.

Look, I’m no Dr. Phil fan, but as he has said in the past, divorce is a right you earn after a lot of hard work.

Divorce is not something you undertake when you believe staying together is no longer what’s “best” for you. Divorce is what you do after you’ve talked and talked and talked about what’s going wrong in your relationship. Divorce is what you do after you seek professional help and it still does not make the situation better. Divorce is the last resort when you have exhausted every other avenue available to you to rescue your marriage and the relationship you are raising your children in and nothing has helped.

And before anyone asks, no, these conversations and any counseling should not be part of their televisions series.

Kate said she hates that they failed. To me, divorce is not a failure. A husband and wife only fail each other when they do not try everything to preserve their commitment.

My oldest in an introvert.
I am anything but, so it’s hard for me to get her. The other day we walked into the pool and two of her acquaintances asked her to join them in a game of cards. She said no and, instead, sat with me for the next hour. I was baffled.
Over the years, I’ve realized that she doesn’t operate like me so I try not to bug her. She can be social and does have friends, but sometimes, she’d rather sit with me than have to extend herself. She’s also perfectly happy to hole up in her room and read a book or play quietly by herself, while her siblings are searching out someone to play with in the neighborhood.
I’m a people person. I’ve been known to while away precious quiet time at home, talking to a friend on the phone. I love meeting new people and making new friends. So I have to catch myself when I start worrying that something might be wrong with Maggie.
She’s just an introvert, and I try to get it as best I can.

My son, Adam, woke up with ear pain early Monday morning. A trip to the doctor revealed that he had swimmer’s ear. But after two days on the antibiotic drops, he was worse, not better, and neither one of us was getting any sleep.
Thanks to Facebook and live friends, I got a lot of advice. Suggestions ranged from the medical, take him to an ENT to have it flushed, to the alternative, ear candling. My husband was so intrigued by this suggestion — which entails putting a special hollow candle in the ear and burning it to draw out excess liquid, wax and debris — that he spent a whole evening on YouTube watching videos of the procedure.
In the end it turned out the swimmer’s ear led to a full blown ear infection. After a day on oral antibiotics and steroid drops, we are finally sleeping again. But the question is how to keep him out of the water now that he’s feeling better. Have any strategies for that?

My guest blogger on Wednesdays is my co-editor, Cheryl Clemens:

OK, I think I might be the only woman around who feels sorry for Kate Gosselin.

My daughters and I have watched “John and Kate Plus Eight” since it started, and we used to love watching the babies as they grew and became more independent.

One thing that became clear early on in the show is that to run a household like theirs, one of the parents has to be ultra-organized < anal almost < if they want to get anything done. And while it’s unlikely you’d ever find two extremely organized people married to each other, the less organized one can’t simple switch to default and wait to be told what to do.

Every few episodes there would be a moment < Kate trying to get six pairs of toddler shoes on 12 wiggly feet while John gets distracted by something in the garage; a visit to a hay maze where John is checking out the entertainment while his kids start running in different directions; Christmas shopping at a toy store where John is just pushing a cart, waiting to be told what to do < when I would think, “I would go crazy married to that guy!”

Now, I’m a firm believer that couples set up their own relationships. Kate has barked at John enough that he doesn’t seem proactive at all. He just waits to be told what to do, then resents being told what to do. Kate has bullied John into following her directions, then resents when he fails to be proactive.

So now Kate is a shrew who chased away her husband and John is an alleged cheater. It’s been said many times recently that no one wins in this situation and I’m sorry for it.

What about you? Do you sympathize with John or Kate?