I was talking to a friend the other day about how to motivate kids to continue an activity and when to let them quit.
My friend’s oldest daughter, 10, is willing to try just about anything but after a year or two — she’s usually done. This happens just as she’s on the cusp of finally mastering the sport. If my friend pushes her to continue, she complains about going and shows no interest in the activity while there. So far they’ve tried soccer, basketball, lacrosse, swimming, gymnastics and tennis.
My younger daughter is similar. After a season of winter swimming, she wanted to call it quits. I had a couple of  issues with this. First, she is pretty good and has a lot of promise. Second, her twin brother wants to continue but only if she will do it with him. And last, it was the perfect thing for both of them in the dead of winter when energy was running high. Swimming a couple of evenings a week gave them the chance to get their itchies out, they had fun and slept great after.
Though maybe it’s a bit harsh of me, I wasn’t inclined to let her quit. She’s the pleaser in the family, so it wasn’t hard to find a little motivation for her to agree to continue. The same was true for a second year of lacrosse — which she wasn’t sure she wanted to pursue. I told her she should really give it another year and she acquiesced.
So my question is, how much do we as parents push and how much is too much? If it appears to be a healthy choice, is it ok to push them to continue? And what if they just give up on everything right when they are starting to learn? What’s the best way to encourage them to continue?