Do you ever think you might qualify for the world’s worst mom?
The other day I was throwing a lacrosse ball at our new pitch back when my youngest sat down on the edge of the driveway right behind it. I told him he better move because I’d been missing a lot. He didn’t move, and I didn’t insist. Next thing you know, I missed and beaned him right in the face. Ouch.
That got me to thinking of some of the really dumb things I’ve done as a mom over the years. Like the time Maggie was a toddler and I was following her down the steps. I stepped down a little too close (probably in a rush) and knocked her over, causing her to fall down half a flight of stairs. Oops was an understatement.
Then last summer we were out on a bike ride, and I stopped to look at something. Jonah was in the seat on the back of my bike and instead of getting him down, I asked Maggie — then 9 — to hold the bike for me. I knew it was a bad idea, but I did it anyway. I got halfway to what I wanted to see and heard the crash. The bike fell over with Jonah in the seat and pulled poor Maggie down with it. A good example of ignoring my mother’s intuition.
This one tops the list. When Jonah was just about 15 months, I was finishing up doing the dishes after dinner. The kids were antsy to go outside, so I asked Maggie, 7 at the time, to keep an eye on Jonah for a few minutes until I could come out. When I got outside, Maggie was inline to use the swing and there was no sign of Jonah. After a frantic 5-second search, I caught sight of him pushing his little bike down the middle of the street. Though I wanted to yell at Maggie for not watching him, it was me that needed the scolding. My 7-year-old was obviously not ready for the responsibility I entrusted her with.
Luckily my kids have survived the past 10 years. They obviously have very capable — and busy — guardian angels. What tops your list of stupid parent tricks?